Refusing to Date: Part 4; Brazen Men

When March Madness began, I decided I wanted to get back out in the social world–which ultimately meant visiting bars once again. I cannot say it is the best way to get back out into the world, but I have also visited art museums, frequently gone to dinner with my mom and friends, as well as partook in family activities with a more open demeanor and brighter attitude.

I’ve enjoyed my time outside of my house and confounding thoughts.

In Part 3, I vowed to make smarter choices when choosing my next “mate” and I have slowly started making new friendships which could have been possible candidates. Unfortunately, these men, at first seemingly intelligent and amiable, regret to respect the ideas of my season to myself.

It has begun to diminish my desires to date.

I am far too old for this.

In 14 days, it will be a year since I left my fiance.

In 14 days, I will allow myself to date again.

In 14 days… I am not sure I want to date again.

These men.

These men in their thirties, act like they are in their twenties.

Not that I am not a mess.

But I confess to each and everyone–exactly where I am set.

Completely and utterly celibate.

Yet, they persist with derogatory innuendos

I shake my head in sober astonishment.

*

But then,

There’s Him

1,204.5 miles away.

My best friend.

Perfectly Imperfect for me.

Brazen only in his

Self-assurance,

Self-reliance,

Intellect and logic.

But the logistics–

*

Maybe I need another season.

Maybe it’s time that I revisit “I Vow to Live, Again“.

11 thoughts on “Refusing to Date: Part 4; Brazen Men

Add yours

      1. The write up is amazing, it talks about the search for love.

        While searching for love, men who ought to be proposing are all after sex, in an hit and run fashion.

        But there is the brazen, your perfect imperfect match…

        Is not that a wow????

        Liked by 1 person

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